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Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of Introverts |  |
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Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of Introverts | |
网友对Quiet Power: The Secret Strengths of Introverts的评论
Man oh man, I wish I had a book like this when I was younger. I grew up in a family that did not accept quiet people. I was always the odd one out, as I preferred a calm and soothing environment to read or think by myself. I hated that the TV was on all the time, that people seemed to be shouting and arguing instead of talking and listening, and, especially, that I was constantly criticized for being too sensitive, too shy, and too reclusive.
I, of course, enjoyed reading Susan Cain's first book, Quiet, but I love that she decided to write another book aimed at a younger audience. I know my childhood experience of being shamed for being "too quiet" isn't unique. And the judgments you absorb as a child stay with you--sometimes for a lifetime, unfortunately. As a kid, I think I would have given anything to hear someone say that it was okay to, well, be me. And that is what this book gives: acceptance. There is no extrovert-bashing in here (quite the opposite, actually), but the book IS a gentle celebration of all people who prefer to approach life in a slightly more calm and deliberate way.
Quiet Power is divided into four sections: School, Socializing, Hobbies, and Home. Each section has several chapters, all pertaining to the main subject of the section. Cain gives a lot of good, practical advice, but she's never pushy or judgmental. Some of my favorite takeaways from this book:
(*) Introverts are good listeners, and they are very focused. This tends to make them good leaders.
(*) Find tactics that help you reduce social anxiety: speak up first; speak up last; or sit up front so you don't have to see others watching you.
(*) Pursue causes you are passionate about, since passion tends to override fear.
(*) It's okay to build your alliances slowly and steadily.
(*) You don't grow out of being shy, you grow into it.
(*) Stretch yourself beyond your comfort zone, but only so far; on a scale of 1 - 10, your anxiety level should be around 5 - 6.
(*) If your kid loves school, but tends to come home and immediately have a meltdown, it might be because she is exhausted by being "on" for the past several hours. Make sure your kid has time to unwind and recharge after big activities. (Um, this was life-changing for our household.)
One of the best things about this book is that all this advice isn't delivered via a lecture; it's demonstrated through personal stories. Most of the stories come from introverted kids (in middle school through college), but there are some stories from famous adults, as well (e.g., Gandhi, Beyonce, Steve Wozniak, Bill Gates, Eleanor Roosevelt, etc.). All of these people experience different levels of introversion. Some are straight up loners; others become class president. There is a lot of variety, which means just about any introvert is going to be able to read this book and find something useful.
Ultimately, Quiet Power is a practical and uplifting resource for introverted kids--and I think it's a helpful book for adults, too, whether you are introverted or not. It can be so hurtful to not be accepted as a kid, and I think it is worthwhile for adults to understand that quiet kids aren't weird or broken. They have their own unique way of experiencing the world and expressing themselves, but they add so much to the conversation. We just need to close our mouths, open our ears, and listen.
I am an extrovert with three (out of 4) introverted children. If you find yourself in this situation, I highly recommend this book. My eldest child probably suffered because I truly did not understand how he functioned as an introvert. Quiet Power gives insight into what it means to be an introvert and practical steps how to function in our world. I very much appreciated the fact that this book does not ask an introvert to change, but rather meet the challenges of life within the framework of their personality. There are times when the author encourages kids to embrace the strength of introversion and other cases where she encourages them to step outside their comfort zone.
I am giving this book 4 out of 5 stars because it is suppose to be written to kids and teens ages 10 and up. Having passed this book around to my teenage children (who are avid fiction and non-fiction readers) I can tell you that the layout and length of the book did not encourage them to read it through. I ended up reading portions over our dinner table, which kicked off some great discussions. One evening I witnessed the light go on in my youngest and most introverted child as he saw that the way he was created could actually be of benefit to him.
The topics covered in this book include what it means to be an introvert at school, in social settings, in outside interests, and at home. Each topic covers what situations are most likely going to feel like to an introvert and how to function well within those environments. I particularly liked times when the author gives introverts ways to succeed in areas that are more difficult for them, like giving a presentation, small talk and leadership.
I see myself either using this book as a parenting resource or putting it by my kid's bedside with pertinent pages marked for them to read at their leisure.
If I could stand on the rooftops and shout like an extrovert to the parent of every introverted preteen and teen, I would say read this book, then give it to your kid! It's that significant. This book is the sequel I've been looking for to parenting an introverted child. (If your child is between 3-10, start with "The Hidden Advantages of the Introverted Child.") Quiet Power offers practical and innovative ideas to teens in their language about understanding themselves and how to find solutions to difficult or tiring social interactions without standing out like a sore thumb or alienating friends. It helps them figure out how to conserve energy for long school days and absorb teachers' instructions. Overall, it empowers them to take these tough adolescent years and thrive, celebrating who they are as individuals and some of the finest people on the planet.
I bought the teen book intentionally, this was when my introverted nature impacted me the most. I wish my parents would have had access to this. I related to the stories of the preteens and teens so much. It somehow released that adolescent who was still wounded and at times still becomes overwhelmed, shut down, and gets stage fright. There are many skills I had intuitively adapted on my own. But it reinforced and gave clarity to how to more deliberately nurture myself and extend my edges.
Loved her adult version and was excited to read this one. My introverted teen is reading it now. As an introvert I find this book empowering and comforting. I finally understand who I am and why. A must read for teachers who often fail to appreciate the "quiet" but smart students in our world that praises the gregarious kids. I plan on giving this book to teachers in hopes they too will recognize the strengths of introverts. It contains much of the info in her adult book, but is a quicker and easier read.
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