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GMAT作文方法及参考例文(五)

2011-06-03 
Besides, unlimited financial aid, such as appropriate and spiritual help, such as …, will weaken the investment on other public construction, such as office building, health care, etc.
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【学生的作业】

Para2:

Undoubtedly, gov should take responsibility to subside art within limitation, because this can both promote the development of art of proper value and manipulate some side effect in the art’s boom, such as illegal speculation, at the same time.

Q:第一句如果是“先承认前提就不要‘within limitation’”,此时怎么处理?

Furthermore, this support will call up public right attitude to the art

On the other hand, if gov provide whatever as the art industry wants, this will evoke the greed of this industry, thus breaking the social order. In other words(不可以放到下一段),……

Besides, unlimited financial aid, such as appropriate and spiritual help, such as …, will weaken the investment on other public construction, such as office building, health care, etc.

Q:是否这段太细所以把“on the other hand”的话说完了呢?

III.结尾:

1.展望未来:如果把握不好度容易无病呻吟,所以建议用第二种

2. “欲擒故纵”:

逻辑原理是:虽然我不同意这观点,但我承认在某些方面还是对的,列出什么好处。但是,就我看来,坏处overweight好处。[LC3]

As given above, I disagree that gov should provide limited support to art. But(不要!) admittedly, it can also makes a different that gov meet whatever desire of the art industry in a short term: rescuing them from a financial crisis suddenly, recovering public’s confidence to the society and the market, etc. But all these above cannot amount to a greater thing than the side effects as I presented to me.

【comments from老鹰】:

1. 思维:可以

2. 词汇和句子:很不好,太抽象。

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