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BEC名师评点网友作文

2008-12-19 
我们都会邀请到BEC名师对BEC版块的网友作文进行评点,为各位同学在BEC的考试准备中助你一臂之力。

本期作文题目:

You are a key account manager for a telecommunications company. You are going to be out of the office for a week.
Write an e-mail of 40-50 words to your client.

*telling them how long you will be away
*explaining where you will be
*suggesting who they can contact while you are away.

Sample:

Dear Mr. Pawlak:

I will be out of the office for ten days from 18th November. I will be attending the Telecommunications Trade Fair in London. While I am away my colleague Marry Richards will be looking after my clients, please contact her with any questions or problems you may have.

网友作文一:

To: sarah, abc company
Fr: nono, manager for aa telecommunications company
Date: Nov. 7th,2008
subject: about a week leave for business trip

I'd like to tell you that [1] I will be one-week leave for a business trip in England from Nov. 10th to Nov.15th. If you have any problems, don't hesitate to contact with my assistant julie whose extension number is 555 and she will help you to do the operation.
Thanks for your coorperation[2].
[1]去掉
[2]去掉。 其他地方很好!

网友作文二:

To : All staff
From: Debbie Zhang
Subject: Out of office

Dear All,
I am in the business trip [1] from Nov. 17 2008 to Nov. 21 2008 to attend training of account management meeting in New York headquarters.
During this period, I cannot reply your email promptly.
For emergence case, please contact below person or call my cellphone: 123456[2]
1. Apply case: John, cellphone: 123456
2. Reimbursement case: Jenny, cellphone: 123456
3. Others: Phoebe, cellphone: 123456 [3]
Thanks,
Regards,
Debbie Zhang
[1]I will be away on a business trip.
[2]一般出差应该是留下同事的联系方式一个就可以,手机不用留的。
[3]Only one is sufficient enough.

网友作文三:

To: All staff
From: Gloria, Account Manager
Date: 12 March,2008
Re: Absence[1]

Dear staff,
I am about to fly to London to take part in an international meeting.So I will be out of the office for the whole week commencing 15 March.If you have any problems,don't hesitate to contact Sandy,my secretary[2].
Thank you!
[1]Be away from office
[2]其余很好!

网友作文四:

To:Ben,bec company
From:Leon,manager of Rain telecommunications company
Date:Nov.21th, 2008
On account of a business trip[1] in France,i will be out of my office from Nov. 22th to Nov. 28th.Please connect my assistant Miss Janice ,she will help you in my trip time. [2]
Thank you.
[1]概念不清楚,文章题目要求的理由没有写。
[2]If you have any problem while I am away, here is her number: 021-65748890

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