Growing up in the U.S., as a first generation Chinese-American, was not an easy experience. However, I feel that my unique experiences have given me insightssintosboth cultures that have helped make me a richer person.
I grew up in the little town of Union City, New Jersey. This working cLAss area has been settled predominately by immigrants of Latin America and is conveniently located across the Hudson River from New York City. I grew up being one of a small minority of Asian individuals in this area. My family came here to make a living as blue-collar workers owning a Chinese restaurant. Most families in China idealize America as this great "Gold Mountain," a land of opportunityswheresanyone can make their fortune if they work hard enough. One is not constrained by familial ties and societal cLAss, which prevents one from advancing in traditional Asian cultures.
My life revolved around this restaurant. My parents worked 12-hour days just to make a comfortable living they could never have attained in China. Both my parents had to make sacrifices to their family and did not receive an education. Unfortunately after 8 years of laborious work and encroaching competition in the area, my parents decided to sell their restaurant and find work in New York City in the hotel industry.
In the meantime, my parents heavily reinforced hard work and education so that my siblings and I wouldn't fallsintosthe same pattern of lost opportunity that they had. They also reinforced obeisance and decorum in their children. As a result of their strict upbringing, when I camesintosmy own in my late teens and early 20s, I rebelled against them. I no longer wanted to be a minion following the words of my parents. I wanted to have my own identity. What I didn't realize was that the core of the Chinese family was instilled centuries ago by the tenets of Confucianism, which placed the focus on the family. These traditional concepts went against all my individualistic ideas from my American cLAsses.
When I reached college age and was leaving for the first time out of the protective grasp of my parents, I didn't know what to do with myself. All my life, I had my parents tell me what I should do or not to do with my life. They didn't want me to go to college or university but instead to business schoolswheresI could get an associate's degree in 2 years and enter the job force as a secretary. Then I would be able to provide for themsintostheir old age. I decided against this course of action and was blacklisted by them for a while. With time, our relationship grew with understanding. They understand that, as Asian-Americans, we are different and our uniqueness should be celebrated. We have the opportunities they dreamed of for themselves as immigrants to the U.S.
第一代美籍华人的成长经历
作为第一代生长在美国的美籍华人并不是件容易的事情。然而我感到正是这种独特的经历,使我具备了一种在中西文化方面受益终身的独到眼光。我是在New Jersey的一个叫Union City长大的。这是一个工薪阶层聚集的地区,居民大部分是来自拉丁美洲的移民,悠闲地居住在纽约州东部的哈德逊河两岸。≤作者:佚名≥
亚洲人是这个地区的少数民族。我们全家移民到这里后,经营一家饭店谋生。许多中国人认为美国是一座金山,是一片充满机会的沃土,只要你辛勤苦干就可以赚大钱。在美国一个人是不会被家庭或者社会等级所束缚的,这种状况影响了我们对亚洲传统文化的理解。
我的生活围着这个餐馆团团转。为了过上在中国永远也没法过上的舒适生活,我的父母每天工作12个小时,他们都不得不为家庭做出一些牺牲,因此他们没受过什么教育。不幸的是经过8年的辛苦劳作,以及我们在该地区同其他饭店的不断竞争,我的父母决定卖掉这个餐馆,在纽约市的饭店区找些工作。
当时我的父母要求我和我的兄弟姐妹们辛苦工作,努力学习,从而使我们不至于像他们一样,错过很多机会。同时他们还要求我们谨尊礼仪。在他们的严格教导下,当我在20岁左右时,我开始有了自己的想法,我不想再做一个唯父母命是从的人,我也想有我自己的思想。然而我没有意识到,几千年前的孔夫子思想早已经深深植根于中国家庭里。而这种传统思想正和我的美国个人主义望其项背。
第一次离开父母的保护伞是在我上大学的时候,我不知道自己该何去何从。我的一生都是我的父母在拿主意,告诉我该做什么,不该做什么。他们不想让我上大学,而想让我读商业学校,因此两年以后我就能够拿到证书,开始做秘书之类的工作了。那样我就能在他们老的时候赡养他们。我决定反抗,于是有一段时间,我被他们视为逆子。然而随着时间的流逝,我们开始互相理解对方。他们意识到作为一个美籍华人,我们是不同的,而我们这种特殊状况应该被利用起来。我们拥有着他们移民到美国时所梦想的所有机会。
≤作者:佚名≥
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